website in het nederlands
website in english
website ins deutch

 

 

 

foto1 foto2 foto3 foto4

About Family Constellation Work

Bert Hellinger a German therapist, found out that each family member is connected with the entire family and that there are certain hidden orders in families which they will unconsciously try to fulfil. A person is entangled when he or she unconsciously takes over the fate of an earlier member of the family and lives it out. With a family constellation we're interested in discovering people`s entanglements in the fates of previous family members as well as in any other kind of unconscious behaviour. This is something that comes to light in a family constellation. When it`s out in the open, a resolution of the entanglement can be more easily found. It is a resolution-oriented approach to work which can reveal hidden dynamics.

How the set-up works

In a constellation the client will choose non-family representatives for the members of her/his family system and then place them in relation to each other. Through the use of representatives, the person involved can observe the psychological dynamics of his or her own family, and from outside identify the patterns which are destructive. The Therapist will ask only for the facts of the events in a family, not about the thoughts or feelings attached to these events, or about the feelings of the client here and now. In family constellations everybody is helping everybody in a caring and confidential atmosphere. It doesn't matter if you are setting up your own system or if you are a representative for someone else's system, being a representative in a constellation will bring you a great experience that will influence your soul in a deep way. Only watching constellations happening can change your life.

"When hidden symmetries appear entanglements are unravelled and truth can be seen" (Bert Hellinger)

"When truth can be seen, healing can happen" (Bert Hellinger)

Why should you use Family Constellation

Family Constellation Work is a phenomenological approach to work with different life issues:


A family constellation should not be used in place of any medical or psychological treatment but it can be used additionally.

What kind of systems can be set up ?


"The here and now is the only time and space where we can hope to perceive reality" (Bert Hellinger)

Frequently asked questions:

How can this work?
Lots of people have tried to explain what exactly is happening but no answer has yet come forward. One way to describe it is that it seems that while the constellation is set up and happening we seem to be in contact with the family soul or a higher system. This allows us to see beyond the visible, not to the immediate surroundings but to the source. How can it affect my life ? Perceptions which appear during the work can be brought into a new order and taken into your soul as a healing picture. This can help balance your current life according to your inner order. By seeing, feeling and experiencing a family constellation the result can be very deep.

What is family constellation work about ?
Bert Hellinger found out that each family member is connected with the entire family and that there are certain hidden orders in families which they will unconsciously try to fulfil. A person is entangled when he or she unconsciously takes over the fate of an earlier member of the family and lives it out. With a family constellation we're interested in discovering people`s entanglements in the fates of previous family members as well as in any other kind of unconscious behaviour. This is something that comes to light in a family constellation. When its out in the open, a resolution of the entanglement can be found more easily. It is a resolution-orientated approach to work which can reveal hidden dynamics.

How does it it work and how does entenglement accur ?
For example, if a child has unjustifiably been given away, even in earlier generations, then a later member of the family will behave as though he or she had been abandoned. Without knowing about the entanglement, the later persons can't find a resolution and can't live their life totally. There seems to be a group conscience that has an effect on all members of the family system. This includes the children, the parents, the grandparents, siblings of parents, an important previous partner of one of the parents. When any one of these group members has been unjustly treated or had a difficult fate the group conscience demands that things be evened up ! This means that when an injustice has occurred in an earlier generation, a later group member will suffer in an attempt to restore order in the group and so it will not be forgotten. This movement is based on blind and unconditional love and is totally unconscious and leads to entanglements with them in their souls. Resolution can appear if the family member who was, for example, given away or who was treated unjustly comes back into the picture, to give him a place and be honoured. The group conscience does not recognise justice for the later members of a system, only for the earlier members. When entanglements and identification can be resolved the person can become free and probably live for the first time in his life his/ her full potential life. According to the orders and the general rule that every member of the family has a right to belong to a family system, something else can be seen. It doesn't matter what your mind thinks or says deep inside there is an unconscious instance which decides if you are guilty or guiltless and if you have to pay to try to even it up or not. A family system is based on faithfulness. This can even lead to children not being happy, more successful or more healthy than their parents or sisters and brothers, because it would appear to them as being different and unfaithful. To declare solidarity with their family they will live in their parents boundaries, what was necessary for them to survive when they were children and how they continue to live unconsciously to not to lose their parents love and belonging to the family. Suffering with a problem is often easier to bear than resolution. That has to do with the fact that suffering and continuing to carry a problem are deeply bound to a feeling of innocence and loyalty at a magical level. It is the deep hope that through one's own suffering another person will be rescued. If this client sees that his aunt doesn't need to be rescued, it's disappointing for him because it means that everything he's suffered on her account has been for nothing. But he then also gets the chance to let the suffering go.

What can entanglement lead to ? Entanglements can lead to various results like acting blind, not living your full potential, not finding the right place in your life, always finding yourself in unhappy relationships or unsuccessful jobs. Even physical and mental diseases, terminal illnesses or frequent accidents may be a result of entanglements with former family members. But because entanglement happens totally subconsciously you are not aware of it. Simply by taking part in a constellation and watching or participating in it healing impulses can be released and resolutions on different levels can be achieved and tension and conflicts can be revealed.

How does the set up work? When you see a family constellation happening, especially for the first time, there will be a magic atmosphere around. A person/ client will choose complete strangers from the audience as representatives for their family or system members and will then place them in relation to each other. Beside the living, it is also possible that he will place those who died tragically or those who didn't have a place in the family. When they have chosen the representatives and placed them in relation to each other the client sits down and the therapist questions the representatives who will then share their feelings or emotions and eventually the physical effects to their body. The answers will often be told in the same way as the person they are representing or they will have the same physical symptoms. This picture shows us the actual state of the family with all the tenseness and entanglements. It is possible to see that a family is a kind of system in which everybody is connected to each other and in which certain orders are followed. Carefully the therapist will work with the representatives and change their place to find a position in which everybody feels better and the order is in place again ! Through the use of representatives, the person involved can observe the psychological dynamics of his or her own family, and identify the patterns which are destructive from outside. The Therapist will only ask for the facts of the events in a family, not about the thoughts or feelings attached to these events, or about the feelings of the client here and now. In systemic constellation work everybody is helping everybody in a caring and confidential atmosphere. It doesn't matter if you are setting up your own system or if you are a representative for some one else's system. Being a representative in a constellation will bring you a great experience which will influence your soul in a deep way. But even only watching constellations happening will change your life.

But how can this work, how can complete strangers feel feelings from other persons ? Lots of people have tried to explain what exactly is happening but no answer has yet come forward. One way to describe it is that it seems that while the constellation is set up and happening we seem to be in contact with the family soul or a higher system. This allows us to see beyond the visible, not at the immediate surroundings but to the source. A set up constellation allows us to see a certain energy field in that particular moment, like a picture of the soul. These can then be brought into a new order and taken into our soul as a healing picture. This can help to balance your current life according to your inner order.

Why do we take over somebody's fate we never met? We can't explain why it is like that but there seems to be a family group consciousness which connects the family members over different generation. And there seem to be certain rules which have to be fulfilled. Sheldrak calls it a morphogenetic field, which provides that every human seems to know from each other. But even without knowing the answer we can work with it. We seem to experience the connection to a greater System, the great soul, that is much bigger than we are.

Who could benefit from a family Constellation ? Anybody who has difficulties dealing with life issues or has the feeling that life always runs down the same path and you don't understand why. It helps us to understand more about ourselves and develop more accurately to our full potential. It is a great tool for those who have already tried different therapies and may want to have another viewpoint and for any personal growth processes. A family constellation should not be used in place of any medical or psychological treatment but it can be used additionally.

What kind of systems can be set up ? Constellations can be set up with any kind of interconnected issues, for example:

Who is Bert Hellinger and since when was his work established? Bert Hellinger was born 1925 and studied Philosophy/ Theology and Psychology. He worked for 16 years in Africa as a missionary. After his return to Germany he studied psychoanalysis, transactional analysis, primal therapy and hypnosis and then developed the systemic family constellation work. His approach for systemic solutions with families and organisations has, within 14 years of being developed rapidly caughton and generated world-wide interest, especially in European countries. Now in more than 25 countries, consultants, therapists and other practitioners are working with the Hellinger Approach.